From europa.eng.gtefsd.com!howland.reston.ans.net!usc!cs.utexas.edu!utnut!utgpu!attcan!ncrcan!two700.canada.ncr.ca!tnelson Sat Jul 3 01:20:21 EDT 1993 Article: 114154 of rec.humor Path: trillian.mit.edu!europa.eng.gtefsd.com!howland.reston.ans.net!usc!cs.utexas.edu!utnut!utgpu!attcan!ncrcan!two700.canada.ncr.ca!tnelson From: Tim.Nelson@Canada.NCR.CA Newsgroups: rec.humor Subject: Canonical List of DO IT lines (AKA Everybody Does It) Message-ID: Date: 2 Jul 93 06:09:44 GMT Sender: news@ncrcan.canada.ncr.ca (News Admin) Reply-To: Tim.Nelson@Canada.NCR.CA Organization: top down of course Lines: 1627 Originator: tnelson@two700.canada.ncr.ca The Canonical List of DO IT lines (AKA Everybody Does It) ========================================================= Revised: 07 June 1993 Mini Table of Contents 1) Introduction 2) PS 3) THE LIST 4) Notes --------------------------------------------------------------------------- INTRODUCTION ------------ As we know EVERYBODY DOES IT; it is just a matter of how and with what. This list contains lines about people of different professions, and in fact a few individuals, who "Do It". Now this list can be taken as pointers on how people have sex, but that is not necessarily the case. Please remember this if you want to submit items to be added to the list. None are to be blatent sexual methods. Thanks to those who started this list (several times over) and continue to contribute to it. Sorry, but I don't know who was first, nor does it really matter. ** There are additional notes at the bottom explaining some of the "do it's" --------------------------------------------------------------------------- PS -- PS. If you have any other DO IT's please email them to me at Tim.Nelson@Canada.NCR.CA --------------------------------------------------------------------------- THE LIST -------- A KING does it with his official seal ACCOUNTANTS are good with figures ACCOUNTANTS do it for profit ACCOUNTANTS do it with balance ACCOUNTANTS do it with double entry ACCY MAJORS do it in numbers ACROPHOBES get down ACTORS do it in the limelight ACTORS do it on camera ACTORS do it on cue ACTORS do it on stage ACTORS play around ACTORS pretend doing it ACUPUNCTURISTS do it with a small prick ADA PROGRAMMERS do it by committee ADA PROGRAMMERS do it in packages ADVERTISERS use the "new, improved" method ADVERTISING MAJORS do it with style AEROBICS INSTRUCTORS do it for the heart AEROBICS INSTRUCTORS do it in step AEROBICS INSTRUCTORS do it until it hurts AEROSPACE ENGINEERS do it with lift and thrust AGENTS do it undercover AI HACKERS do it artificially AI HACKERS do it breadth first AI HACKERS do it depth first AI HACKERS do it robotically AI HACKERS do it with robots AI HACKERS do it with rules AI HACKERS make a big production out of it AI PEOPLE do it with a Lis(ss)p AIR COURIERS do it all over the world in big jets {a} AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLERS do it by radar AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLERS do it in the dark AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLERS do it with their tongue AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLERS tell pilots how to do it AIRLIFTERS penetrate further, linger longer, and drop a bigger load AIRLINE PILOTS do it at incredible heights ALCOHOLICS do it bottles ALEXANDER PORTNOY does it alone ALGEBRAISTS do it with homomorphisms ALGOL 68 PROGRAMMERS do it od ALGOL PROGRAMMERS block it out ALGORITHMIC ANALYSTS do it with a combinatorial explosion ALPINISTS do it higher ALVIN TOFFLER will do it in the future AM DISC JOCKEYS do it with Modulated Amplitude AMBULANCE DRIVERS come quicker AMERICA finds it at Waldenbooks AMERICANS do it patriotically ANAESTHETISTS do it until you fall asleep ANALOG HACKERS do it continuously ANARCHISTS do it revoltingly ANESTHETISTS do it painlessly ANGLERS do it with worms ANIMATORS do it 24 times a second {b} ANNOUNCERS broadcast ANSI does it in the standard way ANTHROPOLOGISTS do it with culture APL PROGRAMMERS are functional APL PROGRAMMERS do it backwards APL PROGRAMMERS do it in a line APL PROGRAMMERS do it with style APOLOGISTS do it orally ARCHEOLOGISTS do it with mummies ARCHEOLOGISTS like it old ARCHERS use longer shafts ARCHITECTS are responsible for the tallest erections ARCHITECTS do it late ARCHITECTS have great plans ARCHITECTURAL HISTORIANS can tell you who put it up, how big it was - - and why it's no longer standing ARCHITECTURE MAJORS stay up all night ARLO GUTHRIE does it on his motorcycle ARMOURS guns penetrate further ARSONIST do it with fire ART HISTORIANS can tell you who did it, where they did it, what they - - used and how they did it, but shudder at the possibility of doing - - it themselves ARTILLERYMEN do it with a burst ARTISTS are exhibitionists ARTISTS do it by design ARTISTS do it in the buff ARTISTS do it with creativity ARTISTS do it with emotion ARTISTS do it with flair ASSASSINS do it from behind ASSEMBLER PROGRAMMERS do it one-to-one ASSEMBLY LINE WORKERS do it over and over ASTRONAUTS do it in orbit ASTRONAUTS do it on the moon ASTRONAUTS do it while spaced out ASTRONOMERS can't do it with the lights on ASTRONOMERS do it all night ASTRONOMERS do it from light-years away ASTRONOMERS do it in the dark ASTRONOMERS do it only at night ASTRONOMERS do it under the stars ASTRONOMERS do it whenever they can find a hole in the clouds ASTRONOMERS do it while gazing at Uranus ASTRONOMERS do it with Uranus ASTRONOMERS do it with all the stars ASTRONOMERS do it with big bang ASTRONOMERS do it with heavenly bodies ASTRONOMERS do it with long tubes ASTRONOMERS do it with stars ASTRONOMERS do it with their telescopes ASTROPHYSICISTS do it with a Big Bang ASTROPHYSICISTS do it with a big bang AT&T does it in long lines ATTORNEYS make better motions AUDIOLOGISTS do it aurally AUDITORS like to examine figures AUSTRALIANS do it down under AUTHORS do it by rote AUTO MAKERS do it with optional equipment AUTO MAKERS do it with standard equipment AUTO MECHANICS do it under hoods, using oil and grease BABIES do it in their pants BABYSITTERS charge by the hour BACH did it with the organ BAILIFFS always come to order BAKERS do it for the dough BAKERS knead it daily BAKERS let it rise BALLERINAS do it en point BALLET DANCERS do it on tip-toe BALLET DANCERS do it with toes BANANA PICKERS do it in bunches BANANAS do it in bunches BAND MEMBERS do it all night BAND MEMBERS do it in a parade BAND MEMBERS do it in front of 100,000 people BAND MEMBERS do it in public BAND MEMBERS do it in sectionals BAND MEMBERS do it on the football field BAND MEMBERS play all night BANJO PLAYERS pluck with a stiff pick BANKERS do it for money, but there is a penalty for early withdrawal BANKERS do it with interest, but pay for early withdrawl BANKERS have bigger assets BANKERS like big deposits BAPTISTS do it under water BARBARIANS do it with anything BARBERS do it and end up with soaping hair BARBERS do it with Brylcreem BARBERS do it with shear pleasure BARTENDERS do it on the rocks BASEBALL PLAYERS do it for a lot of money BASEBALL PLAYERS do it head first BASEBALL PLAYERS do it in series BASEBALL PLAYERS do it in teams BASEBALL PLAYERS do it with their bats BASEBALL PLAYERS hit more home runs BASEBALL PLAYERS make it to first base BASIC PROGRAMMERS GOTO it BASIC PROGRAMMERS do it all over the place BASKETBALL PLAYERS score more often BASS CLARINETS go deep BASS PLAYERS just pluck at BASS PLAYERS just pluck at it BASSISTS do it with their fingers BATMAN does it with Robin BAYSEIANS probably do it BEEKEEPERS like to eat their honey BEER BREWERS do it with more hops BEER DRINKERS get more head BEETHOVEN did it apassionately BEETHOVEN was the first to do it with a full orchestra BELL LABS PROGRAMMERS do it with UNIX BELL-RINGERS pull it themselves BETA TESTERS do it looking for mistakes BICYCLISTS do it off the road BICYCLISTS do it with 10 speeds BIKERS do it on wheels BIOLOGISTS do it with clones BIRDERS do it in the bush BIRDS do it, bees do it, even chimpanzees do it BLONDES do it with a thermos {c} BO JACKSON knows doing it BOARDHEADS do it with stiff masts BODYBUILDERS do it with muscle BODYBUILDERS pump it up BOOKKEEPERS are well balanced BOOKKEEPERS do it for the record BOOKKEEPERS do it with double entry BOOKWORMS only read about it BOSSES delegate the task to others BOUNCERS have more ejections BOWLERS do it in the alley BOWLERS have bigger balls BOXERS do it with fists BOY SCOUTS do it in the woods BREASTSROKERS have better hip action BRIAN does it conservatively BRIAN heads the Conservative Party BRICKLAYERS lay all day BRIDGE PLAYERS do it with finesse BRIDGE PLAYERS don't need a partner, if they have a good hand BRIDGE PLAYERS try to get a rubber BUDDHISTS imagine doing it BUILDING INSPECTORS do it under the table BURGLARS do it without protection BUS DRIVERS come early and pull out on time BUS DRIVERS do it in transit BUSINESSMEN screw you the best they can BUTCHERS have better meat C PROGRAMMERS SWITCH and then BREAK it C PROGRAMMERS SWITCH often C PROGRAMMERS continue it C++ PROGRAMMERS do it with class C++ PROGRAMMERS do it with private members and public objects C++ PROGRAMMERS do it with their friends, in private CADAVERS do it six feet under CADAVERS do it stiffly CADAVERS do it under wraps CADAVERS do it with their eyes closed CALCULUS MAJORS do it in increments CALCULUS STUDENTS do it by parts CALIFORNIANS do it laid back CAMPERS do it in a tent CANADIANS do it bilingually CANADIANS do it in English and French CAR CUSTOMISERS do it with a hot rod CAR MECHANICS jack it CARDIOLOGISTS do it halfheartedly CARDIOLOGISTS do it lightheartedly CARPENTERS do it tongue-in-groove CARPENTERS hammer it harder CARPENTERS nail harder CARPET FITTERS do it on their knees CARPET LAYERS do it on the floor CARTOONISTS do it with just a few good strokes CATHOLICS do it a lot CATHOLICS talk about it afterwards CAVALIERS do it mounted CAVERS do it in the mud CBers do it on the air CELLISTS give better hand jobs CHARLES does it royally CHEERLEADERS do it enthusiastically CHEERLEADERS do it with more enthusiasm CHEFS do it for dessert CHEFS do it in the kitchen CHEFS do it with spice CHEMICAL ENGINEERS do it in packed beds CHEMICAL ENGINEERS do it under a fume hood CHEMISTS do it in an excited state CHEMISTS do it in test tubes CHEMISTS do it in the fume hood CHEMISTS do it periodically on table CHEMISTS do it reactively CHEMISTS like to experiment CHESS PLAYERS check their mates CHESS PLAYERS do it in their minds CHESS PLAYERS do it with knights/kings/queens/bishops/mates CHESS PLAYERS make better mates CHESS PLAYERS mate better CHIEFS do it with tradition CHIROPRACTORS do it by manipulation CHIROPRACTORS do it, but they X-ray it first CHOIR BOYS do it unaccompanied CHRISTIANS do it with amazing grac CIRCUIT DESIGNERS have a very low rise time CIRCUIT DESIGNERS offer VLSI {d} CITY PLANNERS do it with their eyes shut CITY STREET REPAIRMEN do it with three supervisors watching CIVIL ENGINEERS build large erections with rigid members CIVIL ENGINEERS do it by reinforcing it CIVIL ENGINEERS do it in the dirt CIVIL ENGINEERS do it in the soil {e} CIVIL ENGINEERS do it with an erection CIVIL ENGINEERS do it with their bridges (britches) up CIVIL ENGINEERS don't just do it, they give a dam CIVIL ENGINEERS have been doing it as long as there has been dirt and - - they are STEEL doing it CLARINETS do it by sucking and blowing CLERICS do it with their gods CLIMBERS do it in harnesses CLIMBERS do it on rope CLIMBERS do it up thin cracks CLIMBERS do it with dangling nuts {f} CLIMBERS do it with their friends CLIMBERS do it with their hands CLOCK MAKERS do it mechanically CLOWNS do it for laughs CLUSTER ANALYSTS do it in groups COACHES whistle while they work COBOL HACKERS do it by committee COBOL PROGRAMMERS do it very slow COBOL PROGRAMMERS do it with bugs COCKROACHES have done it for millions of years, without apparent ill-effects COCKTAIL WAITRESSES serve highballs COLLECTORS do it in sets COLONEL SANDERS does it, and then licks his fingers COLONEL SANDERS does it, then licks his fingers COMEDIANS do it for laughs COMMANDO'S do it for the insertion COMMODITIES TRADERS do it in the pits COMMUNICATIONS ENGINEERS do it 'til it Hertz COMMUNICATORS do it long distance COMMUNICATORS talk about it COMMUNISTS do it without class COMPLEXITY FREAKS do it with minimum space COMPOSERS do it by numbers COMPOSERS do it with a quill and a staff COMPOSERS do it with entire orchestras COMPOSERS leave it unfinished COMPUTER ENGINEERS do it with minimum delay COMPUTER GAME PLAYERS just can't stop COMPUTER NERDS just simulate it COMPUTER OPERATORS do it upon mount requests COMPUTER OPERATORS get the most out of their software COMPUTER OPERATORS peek before they poke COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS do it bit by bit COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS do it interactively COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS do it logically COMPUTER SCIENCE students do it with hard drives COMPUTER SCIENTISTS do it bit by bit COMPUTER SCIENTISTS do it on command COMPUTER SCIENTISTS simulate doing it COMPUTERS do it in ASCII, except IBM's which use EBCDIC CONDUCTORS do it rhythmically CONDUCTORS do it with the orchestras CONDUCTORS wave it up and down CONFECTIONERS do it sweetly CONGREGATIONALISTS do it in groups CONGRESSMEN do it in the House CONSTRUCTION WORKERS do it higher CONSTRUCTION WORKERS lay a better foundation CONSULTANTS tell others how to do it CONTRABASS CLARINETS go deeper COOKS do it with grease and a lot of heat COOKS do it with oil, sugar and salt COPIER REPAIRMEN do it with duplicity COPS do it arrestingly COPS do it at gun-point COPS do it by the book COPS do it with cuffs COPS do it with electric rods COPS do it with nightsticks COPS have bigger guns COWBOYS handle anything horny COWGIRLS like to ride bareback COWS do it in leather CRANE OPERATORS have swinging balls CREDIT MANAGERS always collect CROSS-WORD PLAYERS do it crossly CROSSCOUNTRY RUNNERS do it in open fields CRYONICISTS stay stiff longer CRYPTOGRAPHERS do it secretly CS111 STUDENTS do it in binary CS111 STUDENTS do it with ORGs CS111 STUDENTS do it with interspersed comments CUCKOOS do it by proxy DAN QUAYLE does it in the dark DANCERS do it in leaps and bounds DANCERS do it on the floor DANCERS do it to music DANCERS do it with grace DANCERS do it with their high heels on DARK HORSES do it come-from-behind DATA PROCESSORS do it in batches DB PEOPLE do it with persistence DEADHEADS do it with Jerry DEBATORS do it in their briefs DEEP-SEA DIVERS do it under extreme pressure DEER HUNTERS will do anything for a buck DELIVERY MEN do it at the rear entrance DEMOCRATIC PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES do it and make you pay for it later DEMOCRATIC PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES do it underwater DEMOCRATIC PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES do it until they can't remember DEMOLITIONS EXPERTS do it till they explode DEMONSTRATERS do it on the street DENTAL HYGENISTS do it till it hurts DENTISTS do it in your mouth DENTISTS do it orally DENTISTS do it prophylactically DENTISTS do it with drills and on chairs DENTISTS do it with filling DEPROGRAMMERS do it with sects DETECTIVES do it under cover DIETICIANS eat better DIGITAL HACKERS do it off and on DIRECT MAILERS get it in the sack DISCOVER (TM) gives you cash back DISPATCHERS do it with frequency DITCH DIGGERS do it in a damp hole DITCH DIGGERS do it in the dirt DIVERS do it deeper DIVERS do it for a score DIVERS do it in three positions {g} DIVERS do it underwater DIVERS do it with a twist DJs do it on request DJs do it on the air DOCTORS do it in the OR DOCTORS do it with injection DOCTORS do it with patience DOCTORS do it with pills DOCTORS prescribe it DOCTORS take two aspirin and do it in the morning DOMINOS does it in 30 minutes or less DON'T do it with a BANKER; most of them are tellers DONERS do it for life {h} DRAMA STUDENTS do it for applause DRAMA STUDENTS do it with an audience DRIVERS do it with their cars DRUGGISTS fill your prescription DRUIDS do it in the bushes DRUIDS do it naturally DRUIDS do it with animals DRUIDS leave no trace DRUMMERS always have hard sticks DRUMMERS beat it DRUMMERS do it in 4/4 time DRUMMERS do it longer DRUMMERS do it louder DRUMMERS do it with a better beat DRUMMERS do it with both hands and feet DRUMMERS do it with great rhythm DRUMMERS do it with rhythm DRUMMERS do it with their wrists DRUMMERS have faster hands DRUMMERS pound it DRUNKS do it all over their shoes. DRYWALLERS are better bangers DUNGEON MASTERS do it any way they feel like DUNGEON MASTERS do it anywhere they damn well please DUNGEON MASTERS do it behind a screen DUNGEON MASTERS do it in ways contrary to the laws of physics DUNGEON MASTERS do it to you real good DUNGEON MASTERS do it whether you like it or not DUNGEON MASTERS do it with dice DUNGEON MASTERS have better encounters DYSLEXIC PARTICLE PHYSICISTS do it with hadrons ECONOMISTS do it at bliss point ECONOMISTS do it cyclically ECONOMISTS do it in an Edgeworth Box ECONOMISTS do it on demand ECONOMISTS do it with a dual ECONOMISTS do it with an atomistic competitor ECONOMISTS do it with interest EE CUMMINGS does it with ease ELECTRICAL EDUCATION MAJORS teach it by example ELECTRICAL ENGINEERS are shocked when they do it ELECTRICAL ENGINEERS do it on an impulse ELECTRICAL ENGINEERS do it with faster rise time ELECTRICAL ENGINEERS do it with large capacities ELECTRICAL ENGINEERS do it with less resistance ELECTRICAL ENGINEERS do it with more frequency and less resistance ELECTRICAL ENGINEERS do it with more power and at higher frequency ELECTRICAL ENGINEERS do it with super position ELECTRICAL ENGINEERS do it without shorts ELECTRICAL ENGINEERS resonate until it hertz ELECTRICIAN undo your shorts for you ELECTRICIANS are qualified to remove your shorts ELECTRICIANS check your shorts ELECTRICIANS do it in their shorts ELECTRICIANS do it just to plug it in ELECTRICIANS do it until it Hertz ELECTRICIANS do it with 'no shorts' ELECTRICIANS do it with spark ELECTROCHEMISTS have greater potential ELECTRONICS TECHNICIANS do it in a solid-state ELEVATOR men do it up and down ELVES do it in fairy rings EMAILERS do it between headers EMPLOYERS do it to employees EMT's do it in ambulances ENGINEERS are erectionist perfectionists ENGINEERS charge by the hour ENGINEERS do it any way they can ENGINEERS do it at calculated angles ENGINEERS do it in Mudd ENGINEERS do it in practice ENGINEERS do it precisely ENGINEERS do it roughly ENGINEERS do it to a first order approximation ENGINEERS do it with a right-handed coordinate system {i} ENGINEERS do it with less energy and greater efficiency ENGINEERS do it with precision ENGINEERS simply neglect it ENGLISH MAJORS do it with an accent ENGLISH MAJORS do it with style ENTOMOLOGISTS do it with insects ENTREPRENEURS do it with creativity and originality ENTYMOLOGISTS do it with bugs ENVIRONMENTALIST do it until it is green ENVIRONMENTALIST recycle it EQUESTRIANS do it in leather EVANGALISTS do it with HIM watching EXECUTIVES do it in briefs EXECUTIVES do it in three piece suits EXECUTIVES have large staffs EXISTENTIALISTS do it alone FACTOR ANALYSTS rotate their principal components FAITH HEALERS do it with whatever they can lay their hands on FANTASY ROLEPLAYERS do it all night FANTASY ROLEPLAYERS do it all weekend FANTASY ROLEPLAYERS do it in a dungeon FANTASY ROLEPLAYERS do it in a group FARMERS do it all over the countryside FARMERS do it in the dirt FARMERS do it on a corn field FARMERS plant it deep FARMERS spread it around FEDERAL EXPRESS COURIERS will absolutely, positively do it overnight FEDERAL EXPRESS EMPLOYEES do it overnight FENCERS do it in a full lunge FENCERS do it in the fleche {j} FENCERS do it with a thrust FENCERS do it with three feet of sword FETUSES do it in-vitro FIGHTER PILOTS do it at incredable speeds FINANCE PROFESSORS don't do it at all; apparently FIREMEN are always in heat FIREMEN do it wearing rubber FIREMEN do it with a big hose FIREMEN do it with a lot of heat FIREMEN find `em hot, and leave `em wet FIREMEN have bigger hoses FISHERMEN are proud of their rods FISHERMEN do it for reel FLAGPOLE SITTERS do it in the air FLAUTISTS blow crosswise FLYERS do it in the air FLYERS do it on top, upside down, or rolling FM DISC JOCKEYS do it in stereo and with high fidelity FOOTBALL PLAYERS are measured by the yard FOOTBALL PLAYERS do it offensively/defensively FORESTERS do it in trees FORGERS do it hot FORMULA ONE RACERS come too fast and in laps FORTH PROGRAMMERS do it from behind FORTRAN PROGRAMMERS do it with SOAP FORTRAN PROGRAMMERS just DO it FOUR-WHEELERS eat more bush FRANK SINATRA does it his way FRATERNITY MEN do it with their little sisters FRENCH HORN *****- self-explanatory FRUSTRATED HACKERS use self-modifying infinite perversion FURRIERS appreciate good beaver FUZZY THEORISTS both do it and don't do it GAMBLERS do it on a hunch GAMBLERS do it with a kidde (kitty) GAME WARDENS do it with animal instinct GAMERS do it by the rules GARBAGEMEN come once a week GARDENERS do it by trimming your bush GARDENERS do it in bed GARDENERS do it on the bushes GARDENERS do it twice a year and then mulch it GARDENERS have 50 foot hoses GAS STATION ATTENDANTS pump all day GENERALS have something to do with the stars GENETISTS do it with sick genes GEOGRAPHERS do it everywhere GEOGRAPHERS do it globally GEOLOGISTS are great explorers GEOLOGISTS do it eruptively, with glow, and always smoke afterwards GEOLOGISTS do it in folded beds GEOLOGISTS do it to get their rocks off GEOLOGISTS know how to make the bedrock GEOMETERS do it constructively GEORGE did it in the Bush GEORGE did it with a Bush in hand GERALD FORD does it on his face GNOMES are too short to do it GNU PROGRAMMERS do it for free and they don't give a damn about look & feel GOLF PLAYERS always sink their putts GOLFERS do it in 18 holes GRADUATES do it by degrees GRAVEDIGGERS die to do it GREEKS do it with their brothers and sisters GREYHOUND DRIVERS do it with fewer stops GUITAR PLAYERS do it with a G-string GUITAR PLAYERS had their licks GUITAR PLAYERS have their pick GUITARISTS strum it with their pick GYMNASTS do it with grace GYMNASTS mount and dismount well GYNEACOLOGISTS mostly sniff, watch and finger HACKERS appreciate virtual dresses HACKERS are I/O experts HACKERS avoid deadly embrace HACKERS discover the powers of two HACKERS do it a little bit HACKERS do it absolutely HACKERS do it all night HACKERS do it at link time HACKERS do it attached HACKERS do it automatically HACKERS do it bottom up HACKERS do it bug-free HACKERS do it by the numbers HACKERS do it concurrently HACKERS do it conditionally HACKERS do it detached HACKERS do it digitally HACKERS do it discretely HACKERS do it during PM HACKERS do it during downtime HACKERS do it efficiently HACKERS do it faster HACKERS do it forever even when they're not supposed to HACKERS do it globally HACKERS do it graphically HACKERS do it immediately HACKERS do it in O(n log n) HACKERS do it in SEXTRAN HACKERS do it in a HRRI HACKERS do it in batches HACKERS do it in dumps HACKERS do it in less space HACKERS do it in libraries HACKERS do it in loops HACKERS do it in parallel HACKERS do it in stacks HACKERS do it in the microcode HACKERS do it in the software HACKERS do it in trees HACKERS do it in two states HACKERS do it indirectly HACKERS do it interactively HACKERS do it iteratively HACKERS do it loaded HACKERS do it locally HACKERS do it randomly HACKERS do it recursively HACKERS do it reentrantly HACKERS do it relocatably HACKERS do it sequentially HACKERS do it synchronously HACKERS do it top down HACKERS do it with DDT HACKERS do it with all sorts of characters HACKERS do it with bugs HACKERS do it with computers HACKERS do it with demons HACKERS do it with editors HACKERS do it with fewer instructions HACKERS do it with high priority HACKERS do it with insertion sorts HACKERS do it with interrupts HACKERS do it with key strokes HACKERS do it with open windows HACKERS do it with phantoms HACKERS do it with quick sorts HACKERS do it with recursive descent HACKERS do it with side effects HACKERS do it with simultaneous access HACKERS do it with slaves HACKERS do it with their fingers HACKERS do it with words HACKERS do it without a net HACKERS do it without arguments HACKERS do it without detaching HACKERS do it without proof of termination HACKERS do it without protection HACKERS do it without you even knowing it HACKERS don't do it -- they're hacking all the time HACKERS get off on tight loops HACKERS get overlaid HACKERS have better software tools HACKERS have faster access routines HACKERS have good hardware HACKERS have high bawd rates HACKERS have high bod rates HACKERS have it where it counts HACKERS have response time HACKERS know all the right MOVs HACKERS know what to diddle HACKERS make it quick HACKERS multiply with stars HACKERS stay logged in longer HACKERS stay up longer HACKERS take big bytes HAIR STYLISTS are shear pleasure HAIRDRESSERS give the best blow jobs HAM OPERATORS do it with frequency HAM RADIO OPERATORS do it till their GigaHertz HAM RADIO OPERATORS do it with higher frequency HAM RADIO OPERATORS do it with more frequency HANDYMEN do it with whatever is available HANDYMEN like good screws HANDYMEN like to pound it in HANG-GLIDERS do it in the air HARDWARE HACKERS are a charge HARDWARE HACKERS do it closely coupled HARDWARE HACKERS do it electrically HARDWARE HACKERS do it intermittently HARDWARE HACKERS do it noisily HARDWARE HACKERS do it on a bus HARDWARE HACKERS do it over a wide temperature range HARDWARE HACKERS do it with AC and DC HARDWARE HACKERS do it with bus drivers HARDWARE HACKERS do it with charge HARDWARE HACKERS do it with connections HARDWARE HACKERS do it with emitter-coupled logic HARDWARE HACKERS do it with female banana plugs HARDWARE HACKERS do it with male connectors HARDWARE HACKERS do it with maximum ratings HARDWARE HACKERS do it with power HARDWARE HACKERS do it with resistance HARDWARE HACKERS do it with transceivers HARDWARE HACKERS do it with uncommon emitters into open collectors HARDWARE HACKERS have faster rise times HARDWARE HACKERS have sensitive probes HARDWARE HACKERS like to finger the mainframe HARDWARE buffs do it in nanoseconds HARDWARE designers' performance is hardware dependant HARPISTS do it by pulling strings HAWAIIANS do it volcanicly HEADQUARTERS controls it HEADQUARTERS knows nothing about it HEDGEHOGS do it cautiously HEINZ does it with great relish HELICOPTER PILOTS do it while hovering HELICOPTER PILOTS do it with autorotation HERC PILOTS deliver bigger loads HERMITS do it alone HEWLETT PACKARD does it with precision HIKERS do it naturally HISTORIANS did it HISTORIANS do it for prosperity HISTORIANS do it over long periods of time HISTORIANS do it with dates HISTORIANS study who did it HOBBITS do it only if it isn't dangerous HOCKEY PLAYERS do it in 90 minutes HOCKEY PLAYERS do it on the ice HOCKEY PLAYERS do it with a snap-shot HOCKEY PLAYERS do it with their sticks HOCKEY PLAYERS do it; so what? HOCKEY PLAYERS like to puck HOCKEY PLAYERS use hard sticks HORN PLAYERS do it French style HORSEBACK RIDERS stay in the saddle longer HUNTERS do it in the bush HUNTERS do it with a bang HUNTERS do it with a big gun HUNTERS eat what they shoot HUNTERS go deeper into the bush HURDLERS do it every 10 meters HYDROGEOLOGISTS do it till they're all wet HYPERTRICHOLOGISTS do it with intensity HYPNOTISTS do it on the count of three I just do it I/O HACKERS do it without interrupt I/O HACKERS have to condition their device first ILLUSIONISTS fake it ILLUSIONISTS only look like they're doing it INDIVIDUALIST does it with himself INDUCTORS dissipate after doing it INFANTRYMEN are ordered to do it INFANTRYMEN do it in the trench INFECTIOUS DISEASE RESEARCHERS do it with breeding and culture INFORMATION THEORISTS analyze it with Wiener filters INSURANCE SALESMEN are premium lovers INTELLIGENCE knows nothing about it INTERIOR DECORATORS do it all over the house INTERNATIONAL RELATIONS MAJORS do it with diplomacy INTERPRETERS do it manually and orally INTROVERTS do it alone INVENTORS find a way to do it INVESTMENT ANALYSTS do it with security IRS does it everywhere IRS does it to everyone ITALIANS do it better {k} JANITORS clean up afterwards JANITORS do it with a plunger JEDI KNIGHTS do it forcefully JEWELLERS mount real gems JEWS worry about doing it JOCKEYS do it at the gate JOCKEYS do it on the horse-back JOCKEYS do it with their horses JOCKEYS do it with whips and saddles JOGGERS do it on the run JOURNALISTS do it write JUDGES do it in chambers JUDGES do it with better rulings JUDGES watch it and give scores JUGGLERS do it in a flash JUGGLERS do it with more balls JUGGLERS do it with their balls in the air KAYAKERS do it rapidly, then roll over and do it again KEYBOARDISTS use all their fingers KEYBOARDISTS use both their hands on one organ KORFBALL PLAYERS do it with the other sex LANDLORDS do it every month LANDSCAPERS plant it deeper LASER PRINTERS do it without making an impression LAWYERS do it in their briefs LAWYERS do it on a table LAWYERS do it on a trial basis LAWYERS do it to you LAWYERS do it with appeal LAWYERS do it with clause LAWYERS do it with extensions in their briefs LAWYERS do it, which is a great pity LAWYERS lie about doing it and charge you for believing them LAWYERS would do it but for 'hung jury' LEFT HANDERS do it right LIBRARIANS do it by the book LIBRARIANS do it on the shelfs LIBRARIANS do it quietly LIFEGUARDS do it on the beach LINEMEN do it with big cables LINEMEN pull their wires LINGUISTS do it with their tongues LIONS do it with pride LISP HACKERS are thweet LISP HACKERS do it in lambda functions LISP HACKERS do it with rplacd LISP PROGRAMMERS do it by recursion LISP PROGRAMMERS do it without unexpected side effects LISP PROGRAMMERS have to stop and collect garbage LOADMASTER 'chute bigger loads LOANS OFFICERS do it with security LOCKSMITHS can get into anything LOGIC PROGRAMMERS do it with unification/resolution LOGICIANS do it consistently and completely LOGICIANS do it or they do not do it LONG DISTANCE RUNNERS last longer LONG JUMPERS do it with a running start LONG-DISTANCE RUNNERS do it on a predetermined route LOTS HACKERS do it sloooooooowwwwwwwwllllllllyyyyyyyy LOUISIANANS do it differently {l} MAC PROGRAMMERS do it in windows MAC USERS do it with mice MAC USERS don't do it, they just point and click on the genital icon MACHINE CODERS do it in bytes MACHINE LANGUAGE PROGRAMMERS do it very fast MACHINISTS do it with screw drivers MACHINISTS drill often MACHINISTS make the best screws MAGES do it with their familiars MAGIC USERS do it with their hands MAGIC USERS have crystal balls MAGIC USERS have magic wands MAGICIANS are quicker than the eye MAGICIANS do it with mirrors MAGICIANS do it with rabbits MAILMEN do it at the mail boxes MAINTENANCE MEN sweep 'em off their feet MALINGERERS do it as long as they can't get out of it MANAGERS do it by delegation MANAGERS have someone do it for them MANAGERS make others do it MANAGERS supervise others MARATHON RUNNERS do it for hours MARINES do it on land, sea or air MARKETING REPs do it on comission MARRIED PEOPLE do it with frozen access MASONS do it secretively MATCH MAKERS do it with singles MATCH MAKERS do it with sticks MATH MAJORS do it by example MATH MAJORS do it by induction MATH MAJORS do it with a pencil MATHEMATICIANS do it as a finite sum of an infinite series MATHEMATICIANS do it as continuous function MATHEMATICIANS do it associatively MATHEMATICIANS do it commutatively MATHEMATICIANS do it constantly MATHEMATICIANS do it continuously MATHEMATICIANS do it discretely MATHEMATICIANS do it exponentially MATHEMATICIANS do it forever if they can do one and can do one more MATHEMATICIANS do it functionally MATHEMATICIANS do it homologically MATHEMATICIANS do it in fields MATHEMATICIANS do it in groups MATHEMATICIANS do it in imaginary domain MATHEMATICIANS do it in imaginary planes MATHEMATICIANS do it in numbers MATHEMATICIANS do it in theory MATHEMATICIANS do it on smooth contours MATHEMATICIANS do it over and under the curves MATHEMATICIANS do it parallel and perpendicular MATHEMATICIANS do it partially MATHEMATICIANS do it rationally MATHEMATICIANS do it reflexively MATHEMATICIANS do it symmetrically MATHEMATICIANS do it to prove themselves MATHEMATICIANS do it to their limits MATHEMATICIANS do it totally MATHEMATICIANS do it transcendentally MATHEMATICIANS do it transitively MATHEMATICIANS do it variably MATHEMATICIANS do it with Nobel's wife MATHEMATICIANS do it with a Minkowski sausage MATHEMATICIANS do it with imaginary parts MATHEMATICIANS do it with linear pairs MATHEMATICIANS do it with odd functions MATHEMATICIANS do it with prime roots MATHEMATICIANS do it with relations MATHEMATICIANS do it with rings MATHEMATICIANS do it with their real parts MATHEMATICIANS do it without limit MATHEMATICIANS do over an open unmeasurable interval MATHEMATICIANS have to prove they did it MATHEMATICIANS prove they did it MATHEMATICIANS take it to the limit MDs only do it if you have appropriate insurance MECHANICAL ENGINEERING MAJORS do it in gear MECHANICAL ENGINEERS do it automatically MECHANICAL ENGINEERS do it with fluid dynamics MECHANICAL ENGINEERS do it with stress and strain MECHANICS do it from underneath MECHANICS do it on their backs MECHANICS do it with oils MECHANICS do it with their tools MECHANICS have to jack it up and then do it MEDICAL RESEARCHERS do it with a mice MEDICAL RESEARCHERS make mice do it first MEDICS do it in an orderly fashion MEDIEVALISTS do it with fake, fluffy weapons MERCHANTS do it to customers MERMAIDS can't do it METALLURGISTS are screw'n edge METALLURGISTS do it in the street METEOROLOGISTS do it at all levels METEOROLOGISTS do it unpredictably METEOROLOGISTS do it with forecasts METHODISTS do it by numbers MICROBIOLOGISTS do it with culture MILITARY TRUCKERS do it bigger, faster and further MILITARY TRUCKERS move bigger loads MILITARY cooks eat it MILKMEN deliver twice a week MILLIONAIRES pay to have it done MILTON BERLE does it in his BVDs MIMES do it without a sound MIMES don't do it; everyone hates a mime MINERS do it deeper than divers MINERS sink deeper shafts MINISTERS do it on Sundays MINISTERS do it vicariously MISSILE ENGINEERS do it in stages MISSILEMEN have better thrust MOBIUS STRIPPERS never show you their back side MODELS do it beautifully MODELS do it in any position MODELS do it with all kinds of fancy dresses on MODEM MANUFACTURERS do it with all sorts of characters MOLECULAR BIOLOGISTS do it with hot probes MONKS do it by hand MOONIES do it within sects MORTICIANS do it gravely MOTHERS do it with their children MOTORCYCLISTS do it between cars MOTORCYCLISTS do it in sidecars MOTORCYCLISTS do it two-up MOTORCYCLISTS do it while leaning MOTORCYCLISTS do it with spread legs MOTORCYCLISTS like it with chains MOTORCYCLISTS like something hot between their legs MOTORCYCLISTS need a sidestand MOTOXERS do it in the dirt MOUNTAIN CLIMBERS do it on the rocks MOUNTAIN CLIMBERS do it till they drop MOUNTAIN CLIMBERS do it with ropes MOVIE STARS do it on film MUDDERS do it over the InterNet MULTITASKERS do it everywhere: concurrently MUSIC HACKERS do it at 3 am MUSIC HACKERS do it audibly MUSIC HACKERS do it in concert MUSIC HACKERS do it in scores MUSIC HACKERS do it with more movements MUSIC HACKERS do it with their organs MUSIC HACKERS want to do it in realtime MUSIC MAJORS do it in a chord MUSICIANS do it in the practice room MUSICIANS do it on a higher scale MUSICIANS do it rhythmically MUSICIANS do it with rhythm MUSICIANS duet NATIVE AMAZONIANS do it with poison tips down along narrow tubes - - from an amazing distance NATIVE AMERICANS do it with reservations NAVIGATORS can show you the way NECROPHILIACS do it cryptically NECROPHILIACS do it until they are dead tired NERDS do it in Rot13 NETWORK HACKERS know how to communicate NETWORK MANAGERS do it in many places at once NEW USERS do it after reading the helpfile NEW USERS do it after receiving advice NEW YORKERS do it in a jam NEWSPAPER BOYS do it in front of every door NIKE just does it NON-SMOKERS do it without huffing and puffing NOVICES do it with instructions NUCLEAR ENGINEERS do it hotter than anything else NUKES do it with more power NUMBER THEORISTS do it "69" NUNS do it out of habit NURSES call the shots NURSES do it painless NURSES do it with TLC NURSES do it with care NURSES do it with intensive care OARSMEN stroke till it hurts OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE PEOPLE do it habitually OCEANOGRAPHERS do it down under OPERATIONS does it with precise execution OPERATOR does it automatically OPERATOR does it in the CTY OPERATORS do it person-to-person OPERATORS mount everything OPERATORS really know how to mount it OPTIMISTS do it without a doubt OPTOMETRISTS do it eyeball-to-eyeball, since they always see eye-to-eye OPTOMETRISTS do it face-to-face ORGANISTS do it with both hands and both feet ORGANISTS pull out all the stops and do it with their feet ORIENTEERS do it in the woods ORTHODONTISTS do it with braces OS PEOPLE would do it if only they didn't 'deadlock' OSTEOPATHS do it until you feel no pain PACIFIC NORTHWEST hackers do it with n loggin' sorts PADRES preach it PAINTERS do it out in the field with brightly coloured sticky substances PAINTERS do it with longer strokes PALADINS do it good or not at all PALADINS don't do it PANTOMIMISTS do it silently PARAMEDICS can revive anything PARATROOPERS do it by vertical insertion PARTICLE PHYSICISTS do it energetically PARTICLE PHYSICISTS to it with *charm* PASCAL PROGRAMMERS REPEAT it PASCAL USERS do it with runtime support PASTORS do it with SPIRIT PATHOLOGISTS do it with corpses PATIENTS do it in bed, sometimes with great pain PEDIATRICIANS do it with children PERCUSSIONISTS beat off PERFECTIONISTS do it better PERVERTED HACKERS do it with POPs PESSIMISTS can't do it PESSIMISTS do it with a sigh PHARMACISTS do it with side effects PHARMACOLOGISTS do it by prescription PHARMACOLOGISTS do it via the oral route PHARMACOLOGISTS do it with affinity PHILOSOPHERS do it for pure reasons PHILOSOPHERS do it in their minds PHILOSOPHERS do it with their minds PHILOSOPHERS go deep PHILOSOPHERS think about doing it PHILOSOPHERS think they do it PHILOSOPHERS wonder why they did it PHONE OPERATORS let their fingers do the walking PHOTOGRAPHERS do it at 68 degrees or not at all PHOTOGRAPHERS do it fisheyed PHOTOGRAPHERS do it in the dark PHOTOGRAPHERS do it while exposing PHOTOGRAPHERS do it with "Enlargers" {m} PHOTOGRAPHERS do it with a flash PHOTOGRAPHERS do it with a zoom PHOTOGRAPHERS do it with their subjects PHOTOTHERAPISTS do it with the lights on PHYSICISTS do it a quantum at a time PHYSICISTS do it at the speed of light PHYSICISTS do it at two places in the universe at one time PHYSICISTS do it attractively PHYSICISTS do it energetically PHYSICISTS do it in black holes PHYSICISTS do it in waves PHYSICISTS do it like Einstein PHYSICISTS do it magnetically PHYSICISTS do it on accelerated frames PHYSICISTS do it particularly PHYSICISTS do it repulsively PHYSICISTS do it strangely PHYSICISTS do it with Charm PHYSICISTS do it with Tensors PHYSICISTS do it with black bodies PHYSICISTS do it with frequency until it Hertz PHYSICISTS do it with large expensive machinery PHYSICISTS do it with rigid bodies PHYSICISTS do it with the help of an absolute Bohr PHYSICISTS do it with their vectors PHYSICISTS do it with uniform harmonic motion PHYSICISTS get a big bang PHYSICS MAJORS do it at the speed of light PIANO PLAYERS have faster fingers PIANO STUDENTS learn on their teachers' instruments PILOTS do it higher PILOTS do it in the cockpit PILOTS do it on the wing PILOTS do it to get high PILOTS do it with flare {n} PILOTS keep it up longer PILOTS stay up longer PING-PONG PLAYERS always smash balls PIRATES do it with stumps PIZZA DELIVERY BOYS come in 30 minutes, or it's free PLASMA PHYSICISTS do it with everything stripped off PLASTERERS to it hard PLAYERS do it in a team PLUMBERS do it under the sink PLUMBERS do it with plumber's friends PLUS PROGRAMMERS cycle forever, until you make them exit PODIATRISTS do it with someone else's feet POKER PLAYERS do it with their own hand POLAROID does it in one step POLAROID does it in seconds POLE VAULTERS do it with long flexible instruments POLICEMEN come when you dial 911 POLICEMEN like big busts POLICEMEN never cop out POLITICIANS bicker about it POLITICIANS do it for 4 years then have to get re-elected POLITICIANS do it to everyone POLITICIANS do it to make the headlines POLITICIANS do it, but they stay in too long and make you pay for it afterwards POLYMER CHEMISTS do it in chains POOL CLEANERS do it wet POPES do it in the woods POST OFFICE WORKERS do it overnight, guaranteed for $8.90 POSTMEN are first class males POSTMEN come slower POSTMEN fill lots of boxes PRESBYTERIANS do it decently and in order PRINCE CHARLES does it in succession PRINTERS do it without wrinkling the sheets PRINTERS reproduce the fastest PROBATE LAWYERS do it willingly PROCRASTINATORS do it later PROCRASTINATORS will do it tomorrow PROCTOLOGISTS do it in the end PROCTOLOGISTS do it with a finger up where the sun don't shine PROFESSORS do it by the book PROFESSORS do it from a grant PROFESSORS do it with class PROFESSORS don't do it; they leave it as an exercise for their students PROFESSORS forget to do it PROGRAMMERS cycle forever, until you make them exit PROGRAMMERS do it all night PROGRAMMERS do it bottom-up PROGRAMMERS do it by pushing and popping PROGRAMMERS do it in higher levels PROGRAMMERS do it in loops PROGRAMMERS do it in software PROGRAMMERS do it on command PROGRAMMERS do it top down PROGRAMMERS do it with bugs PROGRAMMERS do it with disks PROGRAMMERS have: Bigger disks PROGRAMMERS peek before they poke PROGRAMMERS repeat it until done PROGRAMMERS will do it all night, but only if you are debugged PROLOG PROGRAMMERS are a cut above the rest PROMISCUOUS HACKERS share resources PROSTITUTES do it at illegal addresses PROSTITUTES do it for profit PROTESTANTS do it unwillingly PSYCHIATRISTS do it for at least fifty dollars per session PSYCHIATRISTS do it on the couch PSYCHOLOGISTS do it with rats PSYCHOLOGISTS think they do it PUBLIC SPEAKERS do it orally PYROTECHNICIANS do it with flare PYROTECHNICIANS experts do it with a blinding flash QUAKERS do it quietly QUALITATIVE RESEARCHERS know what they're looking for {o} QUANTUM MECHANICS do it in leaps QUANTUM PHYSICIST do it on time RACERS do it with their horses RACERS like to come in first RACQUETBALL PLAYERS do it off the wall RADIO AMATEURS do it with more frequency RADIO AMATEURS do it with two meters {p} RADIO ENGINEERS do it till it MegaHertz RADIO ENGINEERS do it with frequency RADIO and TV ANNOUNCERS broadcast it RADIOCASTERS do it in the air RADIOLOGISTS X-ray it RADIOLOGISTS do it with high frequency RAFTERS do it rapidly RAFTERS do it with long, hard strokes RAILROADERS do it on track RALLY DRIVERS do it sideways RANGERS do it in the woods RAPPERS pump it up RAQUETBALL PLAYERS do it with blue balls RAY TRACERS do it on any available platform {q} REAL ESTATE PEOPLE know all the prime spots RECURSIVE PROGRAMMERS do it over and over and over..... RECYCLERS do it again and again and again REPELLERS do it with ropes REPORTERS do it daily REPORTERS do it for a story REPORTERS do it for the sensation it causes REPUBLICANS do as their lobbyists tell them to REPUBLICANS do it to poor people RESEARCH PROFESSORS do it only if they get grants RESEARCHERS are still looking for it RESEARCHERS do it with control RETAILERS move their merchandise REVENUE CANADA EMPLOYEES do it to everyone RISC ASSEMBLY PROGRAMMERS do it 1073741824 times a second ROBOTS do it mechanically ROCKET SCIENTISTS do it with higher thrust ROCKET SCIENTISTS do it with thrust ROLLER-SKATERS like to roll around ROLLING STONES MAGAZINE does it where they rock ROOFERS do it on top ROOSTERS do it coquettishly ROYAL GUARDS do it in uniforms RUGBY PLAYERS do it with leather balls RUNNERS do it with vigor RUNNERS get into more pants SAIL HACKERS do it with [control] SAIL HACKERS follow the procedure SAIL HACKERS have high service levels SAILORS are best on the sheets SAILORS do it ad nauseam SAILORS do it after cruising the seven seas SAILORS get blown off shore SAILORS like to be blown SALESPEOPLE have a way with their tongues SAX PLAYERS are horny SAXOPHONISTS have curved ones SCEPTICS doubt it can be done SCIENTISTS discovered it SCIENTISTS do it experimentally SCIENTISTS do it with plenty of research SCOTSMEN do it with amazing grace SCUBA DIVERS do it deeper SCULPTORS beat at it until bits fall off SECOND FIDDLES do it vilely SECRETARIES do it from 9 to 5 SEISMOLOGISTS do it when the earth shakes SEISMOLOGISTS make the earth move SEMANTICISTS do it with meaning SENATORS do it on the floor SERGEANTS do it privately SET THEORISTS do it with cardinals SHAKESPEAREAN SCHOLARS do it, or don't do it, that is the question SHEEP do it when led astray SHUBERT didn't finish it SIGNALLERS do it with frequency til it Hertz SIMULATION HACKERS do it with models SIMULATORS do it continously & discretely SINGERS do it with microphones SKATERS do it on ice SKEET SHOOTERS do it 25 times in 9 different positions SKELETONS do it with a bone SKIERS do it spread eagled SKIERS do it with poles SKIERS go down fast SKUNKS do it instinctively SKYDIVERS are good till the last drop SKYDIVERS do it at great heights SKYDIVERS do it in the air SKYDIVERS do it sequentially {r} SKYDIVERS do it spread-eagle SKYDIVERS go down faster SKYDIVERS go in harder {s} SKYDIVERS never do it without a chute SLAVES are masters at it SLAVES do it for the maters SMALL BOAT SAILORS do it by pumping, rocking, and ooching SMALLTALK PROGRAMMERS have more methods SNAKES do it in the grass SNIPERS do it with a single shot SOAP MANUFACTURERS do it with Zest SOCCER PLAYERS do it for kicks SOCCER PLAYERS do it in 90 minutes SOCCER PLAYERS have leather balls SOCIOLOGISTS do it with class SOCIOLOGISTS do it with standard deviations SOCIOLOGY MAJORS do it with a conscience SOFTWARE DESIGNERS do it over and over until they get it right SOFTWARE DESIGNERS do it with system SOFTWARE RELIABLITY SPECIALISTS keep it up longer SOFTWARE TESTERS do it over and over again SOLAR ASTRONOMERS do it all day SOLAR ASTRONOMERS do it with flare SOLDIERS do it in a uniform fashion SOLDIERS do it in an orderly fashion SOLDIERS do it on command SOLDIERS do it standing erect SOLDIERS do it with a machine gun SOLDIERS do shoot it SOLDIERS parade it SONARMEN do it aurally SOPRANOS do it in unison SOVIET HARDLINE LEADERS do it with tanks SPARROWS do it for a lark {t} SPEAKERS do it with pointers SPEAKING CLOCKS do it on the third stroke SPECTROSCOPISTS do it until it hertz SPECTROSCOPISTS do it with frequency and intensity SPEECH COMMUNICATION MAJORS give good oral SPEECH PATHOLOGISTS are oral specialists SPEECH PATHOLOGISTS do it orally SPELEOLOGISTS make a science of going deeper SPELLCASTERS do it with their rods/staves/wands SPELUNKERS do it in narrow dark places SPELUNKERS do it in the hole SPELUNKERS do it underground SPELUNKERS do it while wearing heavy rubber protective devices SPIES do it under cover SPORTSCASTERS like an instant replay SPRINTERS do it after years of conditioning SPRINTERS do it in less than 10 seconds ST MATTHEW did it passionately STAGE HANDS do it behind the scenes STAGE HANDS do it for every scene STAGE HANDS do it in the dark STAGE HANDS do it on cue STAGE HANDS do it on the fly STAND-UP COMICS do it standing up STATISTICIANS do it continuously but discretely STATISTICIANS do it when it counts STATISTICIANS do it with 95% confidence STATISTICIANS do it with large numbers STATISTICIANS do it with only a 5% chance of being rejected STATISTICIANS do it with two-tail T tests STATISTICIANS do it; after all, it's only normal STATISTICIANS probably do it STEWARDESSES do it in the air STRAGGLERS do it in the rear STRUCTURED PROGRAMMERS DO it OD STUDENTS are graded for their performance STUDENTS do it as exercises STUDENTS do it on a guaranteed loan STUDENTS do it with their students STUDENTS use their heads SUBMARINERS do it deeper SUBMARINERS use their torpedoes SUPERCOMPUTER USERS do it in parallel SURFERS do it in the tube. {u} SURFERS do it in waves SURFERS do it standing up SURFERS do it with their wives, or, if unmarried, with their girl friends SURGEONS are smooth operators SURGEONS do it incisively SWASHBUCKLERS do it with three feet of steel SWIMMERS do it in the water SWIMMERS do it under water SWIMMERS do it with a breast stroke SWIMMERS do it with better strokes SWINGING HACKERS move swapped SYSOPS do it with their computers SYSTEM HACKERS are always ready SYSTEM HACKERS get it up quicker SYSTEM HACKERS keep it up longer SYSTEM HACKERS know where to poke SYSTEM HACKERS swap on demand SYSTEM MANAGERS do it with pencils SYSTEMS PROGRAMMERS keep it up longer SYSTEMS go down on their hackers SYSTEMS have black boxes TAILORS come with no strings attached TAILORS make it fit TANKERS do it but leave tracks TANKERS do it with armour TANKERS do it with protection TAP DANCERS do it with their feet TAXI CAB DRIVERS come faster TAXI DRIVERS do it all over town TAXIDERMISTS mount anything TEACHERS do it 50 times after class TEACHERS do it repeatedly TEACHERS do it with class TEACHERS do it with instruction TEACHERS make _you_ do it till you get it right TECHNICIANS do it with frequency TECHNICIANS do it with greater frequency TECHNICIANS do it with high voltage probes TECHNICIANS do it with mechanical assistance TECHNICIANS test it first TEDDY BEARS do it with small children TEDDY ROOSEVELT did it softly, but with a big stick TELEMARKETERS do it over, and over, and over ......... TELEMARKETERS never stop doing it TELEPHONE CO EMPLOYEES let their fingers do the walking TELLERS can handle all deposits and withdrawals TENNIS PLAYERS cannot play with balls all day long {v} TENNIS PLAYERS do it in sets TENNIS PLAYERS do it in their shorts TENNIS PLAYERS have fuzzy balls TEST MAKERS do it sometimes/always/never TESTATORS do it willingly TEXANS do it with oil THE AIR FORCE does it and aims high THE AIR FORCE does it... ...after coffee THE AIR FORCE, aims high, shoots low THE AIRBORNE 'chute their loads THE AIRBORNE does it from above THE ARMY does it 24 hours a day, 365 days a year... THE ARMY does it being all that they can be THE ARMY does it with brute force THE ARTILLERY does it with 155mm guns THE ARTILLERY shoots bigger loads THE BLIND do it with feeling THE CAVALERY does it with charge THE DEAF do it with a sign THE ENERGIZER BUNNY does it and keeps going and going, and going, and going THE FBI does it under cover THE INFANTRY does it cam'ed THE INFANTRY does it in fox-holes THE INFANTRY does it on the attack THE NAVY does it in waves THEATER MAJORS do it with an audience THEATER TECHIES do it in the dark, on cue THEORETICAL ASTRONOMERS only *think* about it THEORETICIANS do it conceptually THEORETICIANS do it with a proof {w} THIEVES do it in leather THIEVES do it when you're not looking THIEVES do it with tools TRAINEES do it as practice TRAMPOLINE ACROBATS do it in the air TRAMPOLINE ACROBATS do it over a net TRAMPOLINE ACROBATS do it swinging from bars TRAMPOLINE ACROBATS do it under the big top TRANSPORT supports it TRANSSEXUALS do it right eventually TRANSVESTITES do it dressed TREE MEN do it in more crotches than anyone else TRIBIOLOGICAL ENGINEERS do it by using lubricants TROMBONE PLAYERS are constantly sliding it in and out TROMBONE PLAYERS do it faster TROMBONE PLAYERS do it in 7 positions TROMBONE PLAYERS do it with slide action finger control TROMBONE PLAYERS do it with slide oil TROMBONE PLAYERS do it with their "F" attachment TROMBONE PLAYERS have something that's always long and hard TROMBONE PLAYERS slide it in and out TROMBONE PLAYERS use more positions TRUCK DRIVERS carry bigger loads TRUCK DRIVERS do it on the road TRUCK DRIVERS have bigger dipsticks TRUCKERS carry bigger loads TRUCKERS have moving experiences TRUMP does it with cash TRUMPET PLAYERS blow hard TRUMPET PLAYERS blow the best TRUMPET PLAYERS can't do it! TRUMPET PLAYERS do it with tighter lips TUBA PLAYERS do it deeper TUBA PLAYERS do it with big horns TUBA PLAYERS usually do it on one and three TV EVANGALISTS do more than lay people TV REPAIRMEN do it in SYNC TV REPAIRMEN do it with a vertical hold TV REPAIRMEN do it with their tubes TWO METER OPERATORS do it with very high frequency TYPESETTERS do it between periods TYPISTS do it in triplicate TYPOGRAPHERS do it to the letter {x} TYPOGRAPHERS do it with tight kerning ULTIMATE PLAYERS do it horizontally UNDERTAKERS do it with corpses UNION EMPLOYEES do it with a quick strike UNIX HACKERS go down all the time UNIX PROGRAMMERS must C her's UNIX don't do it UPS EMPLOYEES do it overnight UROLOGISTS do it in a bottle USENET FREAKS do it with hard drives USENET NEWS FREAKS do it with many groups at once USHERS do it in the dark USURERS do it with high interests VACATIONERS do it in a leisure way VAGRANTS do it everywhere VALUERS really know the price VANGUARD do it ahead of everyone else VEGETARIANS don't do it with meat VENDORS try hard to sell it VERIFIERS check on it VERSIFIERS write poems for it VETERANS have much more experience than the fresh-handed VETERINARIANS are pussy lovers VETERINARIANS do it with animals VETERINARIANS do it with sick animals VICARS do it with amazing grace VICARS substitute others to VICE PRINCIPALS do it with discipline VICTIMS are those who got it VICTORS know how hard to win it VIEWERS do it with eyes VILIFIERS say others don't do it well VILLAGERS do it provincially VIOLINISTS do it gently VIOLINISTS prefer odd positions VIOLONCELLISTS do it low VIRTUOSI appreciate it VISA, its everywhere you want to be VISITORS come and see it VM PROGRAMMERS do it virtualy all the time VOCALISTS are good in their mouths VOLCANOLOGISTS know how violent it can be VOLES dick through it VOLLEYBALL PLAYERS keep it up VOLUNTEERS do it in their spare time VOLUNTEERS do it willingly VOTARISTS decide to contribute themself VOTERS will decide who can do it VOYAGERS do it in between the sea and the sky VULCANS do it logically WAITERS and WAITRESSES do it for tips WAITRESSES do it with chopsticks WAITRESSES serve it piping hot WATER SKIERS come down harder WATER SKIERS do it with cuts WEATHERMEN do it with crystal balls WEATHERMEN do it with storm WELDERS do it with hot rods WELDERS fill all cracks WELDERS heat it up before it cuts WELL DIGGERS do it in a hole WIZZO'S do it with jamming {y} WIZZO'S jam it faster, deeper, and more pwerfully WOODWIND PLAYERS have better tonguing WRESTLERS know the best holds WRESTLERS try not to do it on their backs WRITERS have novel ways WW I GIs did it over there X PROGRAMMERS do it with clients and servers X-RAY ASTRONOMERS do it with with high energy XEROX does it again and again and again and again ZEN BUDDHISTS do it because they don't want to do it because they want to do it ZIPPERMAKERS do it on the fly ZIPPY does it on his lunch break ZOOLOGISTS do it with animals --------------------------------------------------------------------------- NOTES ----- {a} (C)opyright Air Couriers International 1986 Vancouver, BC (apparently) {b} 25 in Europe, 30 in video {c} from the blonde joke list {d} Very Long Sexual Intercourse {e} the difference between CIVIL ENGINEERS and DITCH DIGERS is BS and about $40 per hour wages. {f} used for protection from death when falling {g} re:blood doners {h} For Springboard diving, the positions are Straight Pike (bend only at the waist), Tuck (curl up into a ball) and ??? {i} Submitter said: "I believe it has to do with when you use you fingers to mimic the rotation direction (i.e. fingers curved upwards), the resultant force is in the direction of the thumb. I'm not sure if this is correct. {j} There's some weird accent on one or both of the e's. fleche (pronounced flesh, of course) is a french word meaning "arrow" I believe. It is also the name of a running attack in fencing. {k} this was obviously written by an Italian {l} "Big Easy" -- Dennis Quaid {m} hint: Think of catalogues, products, SIZE {n} airplanes are flared on landing {o} qualitative research is mostly based on observation {p} or 6,10,12,15,17,20,30,40,75,80,160 {q} Reference to the fact that ray tracing takes so long that it's hard to get your picture completed on the machine of choice, so you go looking around for things like 286's and Crays to do it on :) {r} sequential relative work is one part of skydiving where a group of jumpers makes as many different formations as they can during freefall {s} a skydiver is said to "go in" if he/she hits the ground without deploying either parachute; when you consider the terminal velocity of the average human body (upwards of 120mph), this one is fairly obvious) {t} hearsay {u} reference to riding the barrel of a wave {v} too tired {w} double entendre {x} in any face {y} a wizzo is the right-seater in an EF-111A (short for Electronic Warfare Officer - EWO ). "Jamming" refers to Electronic CounterMeasures (ECM) radar jamming techniques. The EF-111A is the fastest ECM aircraft in the world with a top speed of Mach 2 and was used to protect the Air Force's strike aircraft in the raid on Libya in 1986. -- Tim.Nelson@Canada.NCR.CA NCR Canada +1 416 819 4112