From: greywolf@tomcat.vas.viewlogic.com Subject: Bible: Lost In The Translation Date: Wed, 23 Aug 95 19:30:03 EDT { Some of this is as told to me by a friend who got it from somewhere off TV; the rest is original. You get to figure out which is which. } They recently discovered a smaller scroll hidden in the cylinder of the first scroll of the ancient Biblical scriptures, believed to be the actual "first page" of the Bible. When deciphered, it read: "Copyright (c) 300 B.C. God. All Rights Reserved First scrawling First-Sunrise-After-Stonehenge-Keystone- Is-Shadowed, 300 B.C. All beings, places and events depicted in this work are fictional, and any resemblance to actual beings, places and events past, present or future is purely coincidental. WARNING: Some of the actions performed in this work are dangerous and should only be attempted by professionals familiar with the action in question. NOTE: Those tiny points of light in the sky when it gets dark are called 'stars'. Some of them do blow up on occasion. In no way should this be construed as a sign that there is, beneath such an explosion, any form of saviour. Should such a misconstrual happen, the author will not be held responsible for the avalanche of arrogance, zeal, bigotry, humanocentricity and other vile acts which will surely follow the residents of the planet into time eternal until someone sees fit to erase the denizens of the world and let the author start over. DSBN 0-000000-0000-1 Suggested retail: 1 sheep." -- Selected by Jim Griffith. MAIL your joke to funny@clari.net. The "executive moderator" is Brad Templeton. Please! No copyrighted stuff. Also no "mouse balls," dyslexic agnostics, Clinton/Yeltsin/Gates meets God, or "OJ will walk" jokes. Administrative note: Brad Templeton will be doing a signing of the new rec.humor.funny book, titled "The Internet Jokebook" at Borders Books in Milpitas California, 7:30 pm, Friday Aug 25. (Book info is at http://www.clari.net/inetjoke.html)