For Immediate Publication
Santa Claus will not be making his usual stops in the District of Columbia and parts of adjoining areas this year due to the numerous flight restrictions in the area. Claus emphasizes that the decision should not imply a judgment as to whether the boys and girls living in the restricted areas have been bad or good. The FAA's refusal to allow SC Enterprises delivery of gifts in the affected areas, however, speaks for itself. The FAA has allowed SC Enterprises to conduct operations in the vicinity of New York and Boston, but the reindeer powered sleigh must be accompanied by two fighter jets while overflying the two cities.
SC Enterprises continues to negotiate with the FAA in the hopes of at least obtaining delivery rights in areas near nuclear power plants, dams, reservoirs, and college campuses. The talks have been held up by new demands for restrictions near nuclear power plants and by Mayor Richard Daley of Chicago's demand that Santa Claus file a complete itinerary and load manifest with the city before departing the North Pole. Originally Mayor Daley wanted to restrict Santa from flying within 100 miles of Chicago, but last minute negotiations have resulted in permission for Santa to make a single stop at Meigs Field provide he meets Mayor Daley's other requirements.
Residents near nuclear power plants have protested allowing Santa to fly within 10 miles of the plants, stating that the safety of their families is more important than Christmas. Others have expressed the concern that people should not have a merry Christmas at all in view of the tragedy at the World Trade Center. Our view is that these are exactly the reasons we should celebrate Christmas and its message of peace for all mankind. Security officials at the Salt Lake Olympics have not commented publicly on whether they will allow Santa to deliver gifts as usual there other than to note that the Christmas season will be over before the Olympics are sheduled to begin.
SC Enterprises is also attempting to work with the National Security Council's demand that all gifts be delivered in North America and Hawaii before Santa visits the Middle East. This will severely curtail our ability to follow the night westward and greatly reduce the normal time available for gift deliveries. Fortunately, the demand for gifts in the Middle East has been equally reduced due to the unusually high percentage of bad boys and girls there, even though Santa has said that he has a special gift for Osama bin Laden if he is still alive on Christmas Eve, "something more appropriate than the usual willow switches or lump of coal reserved for those guilty of lesser crimes."