Musician wanted.

Help wanted: musician.  Must be willing to travel 200+ days per year,
by car or van, sharing vehicle space and sleeping accommodations with
3 to 5 coworkers, plus professional equipment.  Must  share  driving.
Must be willing to drive all night after working until past midnight.
Must work weekends.  Must provide own professional  equipment  ($2000
minimum). Must provide own insurance for equipment (at high rates) or
be prepared to replace at own expense. Must perform approximately the
same  professional  tasks  3-7  evenings  per  week  in  front  of  a
judgmental audience. Must appear to be spontaneous and to be enjoying
the  experience  each time.  Must display fully professional level of
performance  regardless  of  lack  of  sleep,  ill  health,  or  loud
distractions  from the audience.  Must respond cheerfully to audience
requests. Must be prepared to behave enthusiastically and courteously
at  at  any  times  when  encountering  members  of the public, under
whatever circumstances.  Must behave similarly when  manning  product
sales  tables,  which  must  be done at all performance events.  Must
provide and launder  own  uniform.   Must  have  minimum  five  years
experience,  must  display high level of talent and creative ability,
and must be prepared to either a) take strict direction willingly  or
b)  participate  in  group consensus decisions amicably, depending on
the particular position.  No paid vacation, no  benefits,  no  union.
Must  be  prepared  to  hold down a second job during the daytime, if
necessary, to make up the difference between pay from this job and  a
living  wage.   Must  not  permit  this  second job to interfere with
above-listed travel and performance requirements. Minimal chances for
advancement.