Date: Sat, 17 Jan 1998 03:01:48 EST Reply-To: Irish Traditional Music List From: Zouki Subject: Some Classified Ads You May Have Missed Some Classified Ads You May Have Missed ===================================== Single white male flute player seeks more-or-less platonic relationship with any or all members of Cherish the Ladies. Object: learn a few new tunes, possible long-term commitment. Likes brown rice, agnosticism, and ferrets. Cigar smoker. Reply to box 13DS5. --------------- Gladys: please please PLEASE come back. I've traded in the practice set of war-pipes for a bodhran. I promise never to play an annoying instrument again. Love, your lonely Snuggy-poo. (PS If you're still mad, will you at least call me and tell me where we keep the toilet paper?) --------------- RARE TROPICAL REPTILES AND PIANO ACCORDIONS FOR SALE. BUY ONE, GET ONE FREE! CALL ED AT 212-555-6765. (FIRST THREE CALLERS GET A MONTH'S SUPPLY OF "ED'S YUMMY DRIED FLIES" FREE!!) --------------- The solidly middle-class Irish-American male clientele of Denny's Galway Rest in South Boston would like to invite the Spice Girls to a "Hey, Why Can't We All Just Get Along?" ceili at the pub on February 5th. Music by Battlin' Mike and His Derry Serenaders. Dress optional. Admission $5.00. No cameras. Call 555-9089 for information. --------------- Lost in Denver downtown: Generation tin whistle (Eb) with badly-chewed fipple and traces of drool in holes. Heartbroken poodle is counting on you. Box 98D. --------------- To the beautiful redhead harpist at Delaney's Pub: I apologize for referring to your rugby-playing brother as an Ignorant Mush-Brained Gorilla. Anyway the reconstructive surgery on my face went well and I should be out of the hospital in seven or eight weeks. No hard feelings - I know he didn't do it to hurt me. Can I call you? Reply to Box 9599. ---------------- CANCELLATION 4/5: Keokuk Folk Music Society's presentation of Patagonian fertility songs by the group Gozzo Grande has been cancelled indefinitely due to pressure from local religious groups. Performing instead will be local favorites Les and Mary Gorgenhoffer, whose quasi-Celtic repertoire and uncertain harmonies are sure to delight. Call Toby at 555-9867 for details. ----------------- FOR SALE: cheesy guitar, no name, big crack in back, neck not straight, nest of tarantulas inside, five frets missing, smells like bat guano. Great action. $900. Call Don at 555-1129 evenings. ------------------ Looking for whereabouts of Lester Pishnick, last seen Chicago area 12/8/85. I TOLD him that bringing his trombone to an Irish session might not be a good idea, but would he listen? Now I'm getting concerned. Box 426B. ------------------ WANTED URGENTLY: copy of Dr. Ken Verple's tape "Learn 220 Session Tunes in Less than An Hour through the Power of Suggestion!" Will swap matched set of lava lamps or rare autographed picture of Shane McGowan with full set of teeth. Call Tony at 555-2213. ------------------ To the cute guy I met at the Dervish concert: your post-Freudian analysis of the Marxist tendencies inherent in the empirical denouement of the Clare fiddling style was, at best, infantile and bourgeois, and in serious need of existential reassessment. Otherwise I had a good time. Call me! Love 'n' kisses, Jennifer :) -------------------